I am a parent, a divorced mother, who is willing to financially assist my kids for as long as I am able to. But what if my kids still cannot find a job 2 or 3 years after matric or university? If I am still able to, will I still be willing to financially assist my kids when they should be earning their entire income on their own?

I may not like it if I end up financially assisting my kids into their early twenties or beyond, but they’re my kids. I’m their mother, and as a mother I take on the responsibility of looking after them as best as I can, no matter how old they are. I took on that responsibilty the moment I fell pregnant with them. And besides, I love them.

I do not know how other South African parents feel about financially assisting their kids after their kids have finished matric or university, and struggle to find a job in South Africa. How do you feel? What are your thoughts on giving financial assistance to your children for a long time?

Does being willing to financially assist your children for a long time depend on how hard they seem to be trying to find work or earn a living?

If kids finish matric or university in South Africa and then cannot find a job, will you merely moan to them and everyone else that you are struggling to afford to take care of them while they stay at home, or will you do all that you can to help them find work? Will you take into account that they need to be happy within their job, or will you push all and any money-making opportunities onto them?

If you have honestly been trying really hard to assist your children to find work, or have helped them start their own business and they are still not getting a job or earning a living, what would you do next? Kick them out onto the street to fend for themselves? Or continue trying to help them, and financially assist themm but with a few rules in place for while they continue to live with you?

What would those rules be and what do you plan to do if your children break the rules? Will there be any rewards for abiding by the rules? Would those rewards be that you give financial assistance or would those rewards be that you give or do something else that can benefit the youngster?

I cannot afford to do so, but if I could, I would for as long as I live always offer financial support for the living expenses of my children in return for them putting effort into work they were doing even if that work was not earning them anything. If for example they were happy in a volunteer job making the lives of the less fortunate better, but were not earning any money from it, how could I complain or not offer assistance? If they live a happy rewarding life, my job as a mother has been successful.

It gives me great joy to see my children happy, even if it costs me money. If you feel that if it is of the utmost importance that children earn a decent salary too, then it is the responsibity of their parents to help make that happen.

What are you doing to help ensure your children have a happy, rewarding future? If your children are still young, when they are older and possibly still living at home struggling to earn a living in South Africa, will they abide by your rules, or not?

© Copyright Teresa Schultz 2011, 2012, 2013